The idea of developing and maintaining friendships isn’t unfamiliar to teenagers, but the idea of investing in good, solid, healthy friendships may be new territory for some of your students. This lesson will help teenagers understand how to build this particular habit as they follow Christ.

Lesson Objectives

1. WHAT: Jesus wants us to actively invest time and energy in our friendships.
2. WHY: As teenagers invest in their Jesus-focused friendships, they can experience change and growth, and encourage similar change and growth in their friends.
3. HOW: Students can ask Jesus for wisdom and direction as they look for ways to cultivate and develop healthy Christ-centered friendships.

Primary Scripture: Ecclesiastes 4:9-12

Secondary Scriptures: Proverbs 13:20; 17:17; 20:18; 27:5-6, 17

1. Spend time together

You don’t have to mention any names, but tell us three things you appreciate about your closest friends.

What are some differences between a good, solid, healthy friendship and one that’s unhealthy, destructive, or risky?

When you spend time with your friends, how is it different from when you spend time with your family?

What are some specific ways you spend time with friends that draws both of you—or all of you—closer to Jesus?

It takes time and energy to build and keep friendships. But the investment pays off when you trust your friends, care about them, and want the best for them. In a healthy friendship, people draw strength from each other—and when you have a group of friends, you can draw even more strength. As followers of Christ, we’re called to walk together as we follow Jesus—we want to see growth and change in our friends’ lives, not just our own.

2. Protect and defend each other

This passage talks about how trusted friends protect each other and have each other’s back—talk about a time you experienced this in a friendship.

What sacrifices have you made for your friends—and what sacrifices have they made for you?

Verse 12 refers to the strength of “a triple-braided cord”—why is that kind of cord so strong?

What’s another way to describe the strength that comes from friendships? See if you can come up with another analogy or visual illustration.

Good friends stand up for each other. Good friends protect each other. They may argue or disagree, but they work things out and stand strong together—they become that “triple-braided cord” that “is not easily broken.”

3.  Pick each other back up

How have your friends helped you during the roughest times in life?

Look at verse 10—why is “someone who falls alone” in trouble?

How are your friendships helping you get closer to Jesus or become more like Jesus?

Not only do good friends protect and defend each other, they also help each other after they stumble or face problems. If we care about other people, we want to see them succeed—and we want to help them when they stumble. All of the images in our Scripture passage illustrate the old idea of “strength in numbers,” including those times when we need help getting back on our feet.

BGroup Questions

1. Read Proverbs 13:20; 17:17; 20:18; and 27:5-6, 17. Then, as a group, summarize what these verses reveal about good, solid, healthy friendships.
2. Which one of those verses reminds you of a friendship in your life, and why?
3. What are some ways a friendship between two followers of Jesus might be different from a friendship between two people who aren’t Christ-followers?

TAKE ACTION: Memorize this Scripture this week! “Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed”

**Leaders, leave 3-5 minutes for prayer at the end of your group time.